Useless products have plagued birthdays and the family Christmas for many years. Who hasn't at some stage bought their dad an exploding golf ball, their uncle a novelty mug or their unsuspecting mum an apron with tits on it? They seem like a good idea at the time, but realistically you may as well have stuck $20 in a bottle and thrown it from the top of a very high bridge.

No surprise Granny May's went under a few years ago. I'm surprised What's New is still in business. But unlike Australia, in the neon world of Japan useless products are a big deal. Most people by now have heard of chindogu. Coined by the Japanese inventor and author Kenji Kawakami, chindogu are useless inventions that on the surface appear ingenious but turn out to be humourously useless.

The French lads at ATYPYK have taken the idea a step further. (Thanks to Chris at NowNow for the link.) With products like a sponge microphone for singing in the shower, a sketchbook made from tablecloth for writing ideas and a piggy bank in the shape of a clock for saving time & money; Christmas will never be the same again. My personal favourite is the Revenge CD. The pack contains a set of earplugs and a cd with 20 ear piercing tracks to play loud next time your neighbours are having an early morning soiree at your sleep deprived expense. Tracks include the sounds of a drill, domestic squabble, practicing scales (violin), pigeons and an orgasm (outstanding).

I love these ideas. The only problem I have is that they're still useless. Who wants to pay money for a product that will solve problems that didn't need to be solved at all? They would however work wonderfully as added value for existing brands. The sponge microphone for Playstation's Singstar is an example. It may mean the idea has 'sold out', but it gives the products a little more relevance and ultimately more usefulness.

A pair of such people dreaming up beautiful ideas and matching them to brands are David & Phoebe. Although their inventions have not lived beyond the humble notepad, the ideas are solid gold.